Archelon Ranch by Garrett Cook

"Archelon Ranch is a metafictional thrill ride on a wild gilawalrus, as merciless in its critique of narrative privilege as it is to its characters. Pay your money, take your chance, keep your concept of the self inside the vehicle at all times. The management is not responsible for personae that are lost or mangled.”
-Scott Nicolay, World Fantasy Award Winner, author of Ana Kai Tangata

Je ne suis pas un chapeau. Je suis un homme... In an overgrown, primeval, jungle-city state, Bernard is a test subject for science experiments. His father and Professor Sagramour have been injecting him with hallucinogenic mud and reality affirming drugs so that one day man will be immune to the insanity inducing, zombifying sentient green mud that is choking the suburbs. But Bernard is beginning to display side effects. Experiencing greater and greater levels of Objectivity cause his consciousness to become one with entities as diverse as pterosaurs and martinis. In the mind of the tyrannosaurus he hears the call of Archelon Ranch, a primal paradise like no other. Will Bernard's unique talents be enough to get him out of the senseless prehistoric cyberpunk city or will dinosaurs, Sagramour's Standardizers and the desire to lose himself in other entities be too much?