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Earth Truckers are Easy by Chad Farmer
Earth Truckers are Easy by Chad Farmer
Earth Truckers are Easy by Chad Farmer
$2.99

Earth Truckers are Easy by Chad Farmer

D&T Publishing

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Grizzled Gulf War veteran turned truck driver Jack Hammers reluctantly enlists the aid of a streetwise prostitute Chrystalline to rescue his son from Jack’s sleazy pimp brother who’s also a security guard. After reluctantly stopping at the Get Em N Go. Eventually he finds himself teamed up with Chrystalline to battle intergalactic evil aliens and spoil their plan to overtake earth.

     …A trio of reptilian aliens have crash-landed on Earth just outside of the Get Em N Go truck stop. After observing the behavior of lot lizards in their natural habitat, the aliens morph into prostitutes in order to extract semen from truckers to refuel their spaceship and return to their home planet Zenotho. The only drawback to their plan is that after extracting the semen, the truckers literally shrivel up and die. When the aliens underestimate the grit and toughness of Jack and Chrystalline, they call for a special force alien
team from their home planet to engage in an all-out war with the earthlings.

     …As if everything going down at the Get Em N Go wasn’t enough, a ragtag duo of oversexed and violence-prone men in black operatives tracking the same alien crash landing to the very same truck stop.

As soon as they arrive, things go from bad to way, way worse.
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Filter Reviews:
DL
09/26/2023
Donna L.
United States United States
I recommend this product

Crazy fun

Ridiculous, vulgar, disgusting and hilarious this is such a fun read. If you like comedy horror then this will be the book for you. The character names had me laughing out loud. It felt like I was watching an 80's B movie horror late at night with Elvira. Definitely an enjoyable read.

DL
09/26/2023
Donna L.
I recommend this product

Crazy fun!

Ridiculous, vulgar, disgusting and hilarious this is such a fun read. If you like comedy horror then this will be the book for you. The character names had me laughing out loud. It felt like I was watching an 80's B movie horror late at night with Elvira. Definitely an enjoyable read.

DL
09/26/2023
Donna L.
United States United States
I recommend this product

Crazy fun

Ridiculous, vulgar, disgusting and hilarious this is such a fun read. If you like comedy horror then this will be the book for you. The character names had me laughing out loud. It felt like I was watching an 80's B movie horror late at night with Elvira. Definitely an enjoyable read.

TM
09/21/2023
Terry M.
United States United States

Space Lizards on the Prowl!

EARTH TRUCKERS ARE EASY by Chad Farmer is one f*cked up trip down memory lane for anyone with fond memories of late-night horror movies akin to those the USA Network used to air on their Up All Night broadcast in the early 90's. At first, I was skeptical if I liked this monstrosity, but I stuck with it. Boy, am I glad I did! This book is hilarious in all it's b-movie-esque glory (gory?). The space lizards were here once, but defeated. Now, they're back for revenge with their death squad in tow to settle the score once and for all! What they didn't count on, though, was Jack, his son Dougie, and a tough-as-nails lot lizard named Chrystalline. Will the space lizards get their revenge and get what they need to revitalize their home planet, or will their unexpected adversaries thwart their dastardly plan?

PG
09/21/2023
Paul G.
United States United States
I recommend this product

Grizzled Vet Truckers? Invading Aliens? Roughneck Sex Workers? Yes Please!

Chad Farmer follows up with his debut book DEVIL WON'T LET ME BE with a highly sexually charged Action/ Science Fiction/Horror mashup that brings the goods and then some. With wild characters named Dick Enim Trickle, a hardcore ex-Staff Sergeant out of Vietnam and Jack Hammers, a veteran of the Gulf War, and Crystalline, a roughneck sex worker with a special set of skills. They team up to battle an alien invasion bent on taking over the earth which relies on a human emission being their "special sauce" to fuel their spaceships. Mr. Farmer is a unique writer whose style ventures into an unblinking world of grimy truckstops, brutal truckers, and vicious lot lizards where anything goes viscerally and sexually. While this novella may not be for everyone, if you are unafraid of exploring into a crazy world of insane space aliens and the gritty elements and activities of a truckstop in the middle of nothing and nowhere, buy this book and read it immediately!