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Scissors by Simon McHardy and Sean Hawker
Scissors by Simon McHardy and Sean Hawker

Scissors by Simon McHardy and Sean Hawker

Simon McHardy and Sean Hawker

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Daphne hates her penis. When the National Health Service denies her an operation to remove the offensive organ she takes matters into her own hands. Some cocks won't go down without a bloody fight though.

Customer Reviews
4.9 Based on 15 Reviews
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United States United States
I recommend this product


Daphne is tired of having a penis, and the healthcare system won't approve the surgery to have it removed. So her penis, whom she calls Colin, is removed by a pair of her own scissors and buried in her backyard. This angers Colin and the insanity begins. Another hilarious story from the duo who always push the boundaries. Laugh outloud funny shenanigans and over-the-top insanity. Don't miss it!  Check it out! 5 severed fingers out of 5

Gerhard G.
Canada Canada
I recommend this product

The last thing I needed in my life was this story.

Scissors made me physically ill like no other book or story ever has. That isn't to say that, if I could turn back time and not read Scissors, I wouldn't. Because that just isn't the case.  Scissors did what few books do, it allowed me to see. You see, I have Aphantasia, and what that means is that I can't imagine things. When I read, it's all words. I do dream, though. And every once in a while (like once in a blue moon), an image breaks through, and even rarer still, a string of small events. And that is what happened with Scissors. The story grabbed me by the throat, and it sat on my chest - all 600 lbs of it - so I couldn't breath, or put the tablet down. And then, when the Scissors came to life, I could see what they were up to, like they in the next room. I didn't want to, but I have never had an experience like that, and I will cherish it forever.

Matt C.
United Kingdom United Kingdom
I recommend this product

Snip Snip!

Started out fairly tame… felt a little sick by the end!

Tim E.
United States United States
I recommend this product

Move over rats, haunted cars, and move over S. King...step in Mchardy/Hawker

I went into this knowing this duo was extreme and this tale had me at the first line. The story has an extreme, haunting realism with McHardy/Hawker's usual splatter nature. Not recommended for weak stomach or soft-minded people, but highly recommended for the voyeur into a lifestyle that some in this blindfolded world will never understand. Great job! I look forward to more!

Kevin S.
United Kingdom United Kingdom
I recommend this product

Look, By This Point You Should Know What You're Getting Into When You See Either of These Two Reprobates Names...

*Sees new title on* A story called "Scissors" by McHardy and the Hawkman? Oh dear gawd... *Reads description* Awww GAWWDD... *Reads story* Yep, that was definitely a McHardy and Hawker tale. Fuck me...