Small Short Stories to Read in One Shitting by RJ Benetti
This is The Shit
A shitload of funny and unique stories. I laughed, I cried, I needed to do a maintenance wipe.
Benetti is back with these shorts and drabbles that have been scientifically worked out to be the perfect length for a bathroom break, whether you need a quick one liner, or a longer, more satisfying few pages!! I personally read the whole thing in one shiing!! That says a lot about my diet!! So, for this review, Im just going to list all the stories and write a few words for each! All of them were fab, my faves were ITCHY! PINATA! M.A.D.D! HIGH SCHOOL PARTY and SCABBIE! BREAKFAST - Just what in the hell did Mother have for breakfast this morning? Youll need some loo roll and a barf bag for this one! RIDESHARE - Really creepy and horrifying, all in one paragraph! FARTS IN JARS - A tongue in (arse) cheek look at a very modern money maker! ITCHY - Fu##ing Lice!! Literally!! Be careful who you sit next to on the train! Utterly, brilliantly vile! KILLOWS - Just me that thinks this is a great idea? I mean, I have a real snorey partner! NIGHT MOVES - Hilarious, slimey and a little sad! PINATA - This one literally gave me nightmares! RUNDOWN - A nail storm is not the best thing when youre made of wood. Brilliantly bizarre and brutal! PENETRATION - A cute little poem! OFF THE TOP - Brutal!! SOCIAL DISTANCING - Social distancing gone too far! Another sad one ☹️ M.A.D.D. - I have a new fave word: 'Grundle' If your names Diedrich, Im sorry but, youre f**ked! This one is savage!! HUNGRY - A tasty little drabble! HIGH SCHOOL PARTY - When you take an invitation quite literally! NECRO - When the necro tables get turned! FIVE FINGER FILLET - Oooooops!! SLOW DOWN - Hilarious and kinky! EYEBROWS - This one will stick with you! "You know youre lookin!" LITERAL - Do as youre told! ED GEIN INTERIOR DESIGNER - Good, fun advice! CONES - Watch out for the traffic cones! EXORCISING - Agonising and eternal revenge! FINANCIAL RUIN - Anything you can do, I can do better! Ouch......or not! THE LAST MOMENTS OF HEMINGWAY - Brilliant take on an eye chart! TWISTED UP- Another new word: 'Blumpkin' Look it up....I dare ya!! SCABBIE - Horrific!! Made me urge!! SUPREME - Bizarre!! I still dont know! ♀️ **Pretty sure my review is longer than the book!! **
One thing about a Benetti book, is you're getting something special and goddamn unique. This collection crammed with a bunch of shit is perfect for a quick read on the bowl, or winging a white stream out the old peehole. Diversity, plenty of filth, written by one beautifully depraved mind which tickles that patch between my thighs. Want something to take with you on those lonely deposits? Then grab this piece- now!
Shits and giggles
Well, it's been a while since I laughed that hard, plus the toilet dedication already had me giggling. Kicking the collection off with Breakfast. Which made me lose mine ironically, mostly because I choked on it. That involved bowels flying as well as genitals and made me realise I was in for a hell of a ride. The Rideshare story had an excellent little twist as did Killows, plus the style of that story has an interesting structure and it's so creatively done. Fart Jars did make me cringe though, and the list of wears had me in stitches. A cautionary tale of being careful what you buy, especially if it's to indulge a fetish even I didn't know existed. By the way, don't google fart jar fetish you will need to wash your eyes after. Itchy, made me itch and recoil in horror but bloody hell what an imagination RJ has. I mean after Santa Muerte Claus I don't know why I was surprised, but yeah these stories were created by a twisted imagination. That has now become a bit of guilty pleasure for me, each story carrying its level of comedy. Night moves have to be the ones that visually won't leave my mind. Mostly for the image that RJ conjures up in regards to this incredibly pathetic excuse for a pervert trying to live his best life. Every short story from Pinata to penetration took the basic structure and made it something new and different for the reader. Which didn't make it the same as every other short story collection; it instead added a level of creativity. Showing that you can play around with how you want your story to look and also flow uniquely. Social Distancing was a nice change of pace but also yanked at my heartstrings big time. Considering what we've all been through the past two years with covid this one yanked the floor from under me. Necro became another favourite of mine for the sheer depraved that turns this into a violent revenge story in a few quick snaps. RJ shows a great deal of versatility in this collection. He creeped me out with what seemed like the most mundane things, like Eyebrows. He managed to make my eyebrows unnerve me, but one thing he excels at in this collection. Is hitting home with certain topics, such as Financial Ruin. We've all been there feeling like we aren't worthy compared to others. He makes you think deeply about the subject of worth, so not only did he crack me up countless times. He also managed to consider some hard-hitting topics and make the reader analyse things from his point of view. As always he never disappoints and I can't wait to get through the Slappening.
I read this in one sitting
Impressive collection of drabbles, poems and shorties to read to your sphincter until it releases its hostages.