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Scats, Splats, and Stupid Twats by Jonathan Butcher
Scats, Splats, and Stupid Twats by Jonathan Butcher
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Scats, Splats, and Stupid Twats by Jonathan Butcher

Jonathan Butcher

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An icky assortment of rare and unreleased drabbles and shorts – plus the story that inspired the extreme horror novel, CHOCOLATEMAN.

This mini-collection shows the range of Butcher’s work, from eerie to amusing to unpalatable. There’s even one story that he thought too mean-spirited to ever see the light of day – but here it is, exclusively on Godless.

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Filter Reviews:
JN
01/23/2022
Jason N.
United States United States

Early Kreb

Great little collection of stories. Gross, funny, and entertaining. Butcher is a beast!

NW
11/14/2021
Natalie W.
United Kingdom United Kingdom
I recommend this product

Gross

So story one follows Kerb, the chocolate man, and before you get excited, it's not that kind of chocolate. The story is both gross and fascinating. Learning about the chocolate man, and not going to lie, I won't be repeating that rhyme anytime soon. Although the other character was also well developed and I loved how he was the complete polar opposite of Kerb and built the story up so well. It's an excellent set-up for Jonathan’s novel that's now been released. The short but snappy Package was both funny and terrifying at the same time. But it made me realise older adults shouldn't have familiars for this reason. Then There's a Mother’s Love, and He Grows, a short shocker story that leaves you sitting there going shit; what did I read? Seriously dude, where do you come up with this stuff!? Slop had to be inspired by a Serbian film cose that is the level of messed up that story was. Making Andy smile was another seasonal ‘joy’ this time for Christmas. Creepily it was kind of heartwarming, but I do love a good revenge tale. Pretty C***, yeah, I blanked out; some words still make me wonder if my dad’s ears perk up. It was what you would expect from the title, blood, gore and a squeaky bum moment. The poem at the end was a nice touch to finish off the collection, Jonathan. I am incredibly impressed and can't wait to see what comes next from your twisted brain.

N
11/02/2021
Nat
United Kingdom United Kingdom

Holy Shit...no Pun Intended

So story one follows Kerb, the chocolate man, and before you get excited, it's not that kind of chocolate. The story is both gross and engrossing. Learning about the chocolate man, and not going to lie, I won't be repeating that rhyme anytime soon. Although the other character was also well developed and I loved how he was the complete polar opposite of Kerb and built the story up so well. It's an excellent set-up for Jonathan’s novel that's now been released. The short but snappy Package was both funny and terrifying at the same time. But it kinda made me realise old people shouldn't have familiars for this reason. Then There's a Mother’s Love and He Grows, short shocker story that definitely leaves you sitting there going shit what did I read? Seriously dude where do you come up with this stuff!? Slop had to be inspired by a Serbian film cose that is the level of messed up that story was. Making Andy smile was another seasonal ‘joy’ this time for Christmas. In a creepy kind of way it was kind of heartwarming, but I do love a good revenge tale. Pretty C***, yeah I blanked out there are some words that still make me wonder if my dad’s ears perk up. Was what you would expect from the title, blood, gore and a squeaky bum moment. The poem at the end was a nice touch to finish off the collection, Jonathan I am incredibly impressed and can't wait to see what comes next from your twisted brain

GG
10/27/2021
Gerhard G.
I recommend this product

Scats, Splats, etc. is POSITIVELY vile! AND I LOVED EVERY WORD OF IT!

Jonathan Butcher is a man after my own heart. His blend of splatterpunk and extreme potty humor is just what the doctor ordered. Dr. Demento, that is - and with elements taken from the world of the bizarre, what more could you ask for?

NP
10/16/2021
Nikolas P.
United States United States
I recommend this product

...There I'll Be.

Jonathan Butcher has assembled quite the vile and visceral collection of stories in Scats, Splats, and Stupid Twats. It's a quick read, but one that manages to leave one hell of an impact on the reader. The anchor of this collection, The Chocolateman, definitely has me anticipating the release of the novel inspired by this short. A disorienting and frankly revolting chance encounter in a public restroom sets the stage for a particularly filthy sort of horror befalling a man who despises any manner of filth. The stories Slop and Pretty Cunt showcase a certain graphic and visceral reaction to infidelity that will satisfy anyone who has been on the receiving end of that sort of treatment. Taking everything too far, Butcher provides a catharsis, penning fantasies that bring to light some of the darker thoughts people have experienced in times of pain and vulnerability. The other four stories run the gamut of topics. We experience the undying love between a mother and child, the harsh consequence of senility afflicting a wizard, a Halloween ritual of monstrous proportions, and a broken home struggling to stitch itself together. Butcher also includes a poem replete with fantastic descriptive elements and visually stunning imagery. This is a fantastic collection of shorts that will absolutely demand the attention of any reader brave enough to dive in.